Female Independence…What’s the big deal?

So as I’ve been working on my goals and trying to push forward in my God given purpose I’ve been hearing a lot about my choices and how they will effect my ability “to get” a husband. The craziest thing is that I hear this more from females than I do from men. This really made me think about what society is telling our girls and women.

So this all started with me working towards purchasing a home. Somehow this will ruin my chances of “getting” a husband because “What will your husband be able to do for you?”. This is where I guess my mindset is much different…imagine a female having he “stuff” together and meeting a man who also has his “stuff” together (Note: Have the characteristics that you expect to see in a spouse) then that allows both parties to merge their respective “stuff” and build an empire together. I have always been taught that you should have your own passion, goals, and accomplishments and in the process of achieving those goals your soulmate will find you.

I guess I just wanted to reassure women who are constantly hearing that they need a man to achieve some major life goals such as buying a home, starting your own business, traveling, etc. that you should know that if it is something that you’re passionate about you should pursue it on your own and you never know, during that process of self progression you may find your mate. Think about it, if you have a home and your mate has a home then when you all get together you could use both of those homes as rental property while purchasing a home together. This allows you to come into a relationship with equity that can benefit your union. Also if you want your doctorate degree or want a leadership position at work, go for it….don’t let people make you think that by having that status in your career that it will make it impossible for you to date. Don’t think that you have to downplay your MAGIC in order to keep a man. Any man who really wants a wife will want one who has something to offer and who he can build an empire with as PARTNERS.

I hope this helps someone who has been dimming their light in order to keep or get a man. Remember you are strong, beautiful and you should always Be Fearlessly Authentic!

~Be Fearlessly Authentic~

Reba J.


Welcome to 2017



Alright Ladies and Gents we have entered a new year filled with opportunity and experiences! This is also the time of year where people tend to reflect on the previous year and determine what goals they would like to set for the new year. I personally had a WONDERFUL and TRANSITIONAL 2016 and am really excited about what PROGRESS 2017 has in store for me. So in my process of reflection and goal drafting I decided to host a vision board party where my friends and I were able to draft our goals and visions for the new year. I thought that I would share with you all the most effective way to create goals for the new year that you can realistically achieve or make major moves to accomplishing those goals.

First thing first….

  1. Make REALISTIC GOALS but also make goals that you know you will have to work hard at achieving. I compare this to the college application process where you had your safe schools, medium schools, and reaching schools. You should have some goals that you know you can accomplish within 12 months and will not take much more that determination and dedication. Then you should have goals that require consistency, determination and dedication. Lastly, you should have goals that you will have to plan, revisit, create opportunities, and practice consistency, determination and dedication to achieve.
  2. Next you need to WRITE DOWN YOUR GOALS in a list format and in a place where you can see it everyday to ensure that they are etched into your subconscious. Make sure to take steps every day to accomplish each of those goals. Each time you see your goals you should pray/meditate over it, believe that you will achieve it and prepare yourself to accomplish that goal. Remember that there is no need for you to stress over the goal…just work within reason and put out positive vibes about achieving that level of success.
  3. Last but definitely not least you definitely need to PRACTICE PATIENCE. As you know I talk about patience often on this blog because that happens to be one of the most impactful characteristics of a  human being. Understanding that “success is not a sprint but a marathon” and to make sure you take the time to appreciate the journey will make the practice of patience much more enjoyable. You tend to learn a lot about yourself and those around you during this journey so if you’re not taking the time to “be in the moment” then you will miss all of these lessons and will see yourself making the same mistakes over and over again.

So before I go I would like to give you all some guidance with drafting your goals/resolutions for this year. Remember this is an intimate process and it should be about your personal needs and wants and not those that society tends to place upon us. After  you have taken the time to understand your passion and purpose then you can start drafting goals in each of these categories:

  1. Personal Life– Things like learn a language, meditation, spiritual wellbeing, etc.
  2. Financial– Saving, buying something, or investing in something.
  3. Career– Advancement in your current position or transitioning to a new position
  4. Health– Physical (working out and diet), Mental (meditation, taking time to yourself, changing your mindset), and Spiritual (Yoga, meditation, devotionals, reading, etc.)
  5. Relationships– Mending friendship, keeping in touch with family members and loved ones, or allowing yourself to develop new relationships.

Just remember to BE IN THE MOMENT this year and appreciate your current situation as you work towards achieving your goals!

~Be Fearless Authentic~

Reba J.