Female Independence…What’s the big deal?

So as I’ve been working on my goals and trying to push forward in my God given purpose I’ve been hearing a lot about my choices and how they will effect my ability “to get” a husband. The craziest thing is that I hear this more from females than I do from men. This really made me think about what society is telling our girls and women.

So this all started with me working towards purchasing a home. Somehow this will ruin my chances of “getting” a husband because “What will your husband be able to do for you?”. This is where I guess my mindset is much different…imagine a female having he “stuff” together and meeting a man who also has his “stuff” together (Note: Have the characteristics that you expect to see in a spouse) then that allows both parties to merge their respective “stuff” and build an empire together. I have always been taught that you should have your own passion, goals, and accomplishments and in the process of achieving those goals your soulmate will find you.

I guess I just wanted to reassure women who are constantly hearing that they need a man to achieve some major life goals such as buying a home, starting your own business, traveling, etc. that you should know that if it is something that you’re passionate about you should pursue it on your own and you never know, during that process of self progression you may find your mate. Think about it, if you have a home and your mate has a home then when you all get together you could use both of those homes as rental property while purchasing a home together. This allows you to come into a relationship with equity that can benefit your union. Also if you want your doctorate degree or want a leadership position at work, go for it….don’t let people make you think that by having that status in your career that it will make it impossible for you to date. Don’t think that you have to downplay your MAGIC in order to keep a man. Any man who really wants a wife will want one who has something to offer and who he can build an empire with as PARTNERS.

I hope this helps someone who has been dimming their light in order to keep or get a man. Remember you are strong, beautiful and you should always Be Fearlessly Authentic!

~Be Fearlessly Authentic~

Reba J.




Whew! It has been a long time coming! Finally starting my lifestyle and motivational Blog! I have experienced a lot in my 20 some odd years and I would love to share my experiences with you!

I hope you’re excited and ready to hear about random experiences of a Spiritual, Young, Caribbean, Esquire In The City with a love of God, Meditation, Fashion, Travel, Music, the Arts and just Living life to the fullest!

Quote of the day:

“God will grant us STRENGTH when we take a Leap of Faith!”

This quote means so much to me because  the only way that I would be able to achieve my dreams and goals is by continuing to trust that God will give me the STRENGTH necessary to weather the storm. Like when I moved to Charlotte, NC for Law School, packed up and moved to Atlanta, GA to take the Bar and practice even when I move to Savannah when I was offered my first Associate position I trusted that God would place great people in my life and that I would have the STRENGTH to not only survive but excel in those new environments . Even though not all leaps of faith proved to be fruitful in the way that I had imagined there was still “Beauty in the Struggle” (J. Cole) and I appreciate the lessons learned from each struggle and am excited for the future.

So when you feel like something keeps pulling you in the direction of a dream or goal that you have held near for so long but are afraid of failing remember that fear is just a form of vulnerability and through God you will gain the strength needed to push past those fears and live the life that you were destined. Don’t allow fear to keep you in bondage!

Get ready for absolute greatness!

-Reba J.

~Be Fearlessly Authentic~